Pain in Parenting

My stomach churns and my heart burns...it's the pain I'm bearing in being a parent. You laugh, but it's true! I have heartburn because I'm trying to teach one of my kids a lesson. See, our son constantly complains about the meal that has been prepared for him. Literally, not a meal goes by that he doesn't have something to complain about. It drives me crazy!

Frustrated, I told him that I was tired of his complaining and that he could start cooking dinner for us. He was more than willing to cook and last night was his first night. He made spaghetti. I tried to assist him but he kicked me out of the kitchen. Later, looking at his sauce, he tells me it's too soupy. I laughed because he was complaining about his own cooking! I'm excited because I'm thinking that his having to cook is going to help him appreciate what someone makes for him and he will learn and stop complaining. Proudly he serves us our meal. Wow, it tasted like he poured an entire box of salt into it! And, it was full of pepper. We choked it down but when I was almost finished I realized he had not eaten his. Did he do this to us to get us back? As a joke, he might do that. But no, to my surprise, he had complaints about his own food and wouldn't eat it! Unbelievable! My husband and I were left eating a pack of Tums for dessert. Sadly for us, he is cooking again tonight and I'm out of Tums. I mentioned to my husband that this lesson is going to be harder on us than it is on him.

Sometimes parenting hurts the parents more than the kids, in this case, the physical pain of heartburn! Seriously though, many times it hurts to watch our kids learn lessons caused by their behavior because the consequences for their actions can be painful and hard. Sometimes we parents even remove the pain of the consequences because it hurts us so badly that we can't bear to see our kids go through it but then the lesson isn't learned. I believe it's the same with God when we are suffering painful consequences and learning lessons. Our pain hurts God as much as it hurts us. The thing I'm reminded of though is that God, no matter how much it hurts Him, allows us to continue in the pain of our consequences so that we learn. It makes me think of what James says in chapter 1:2-4 - Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 

My encouragement to you is when you want to pull your kids out of their pain because it hurts you, don't. God your father allows you to go through the pain, so follow His example with your kids. It's hard, I know from personal experience, but in the end, it will all be worth it when your kids grow up to be godly men and women. But depending on the lesson, you might want to buy some Tums!